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Category: English Jokes

Duckworth Lewis System

Posted on July 2, 2025 By Admin Comedy Majors No Comments on Duckworth Lewis System
English Jokes

Father- how much rank you got in 10th exam?
Son- I got 2nd rank Dad!
Father- Why 2nd? Why you didn’t get 1st rank?
Son- Actually Anil and me got same marks. But they gave Anil 1st rank and me 2nd rank.
Father- Why? Both should get 1st rank?
Son – They applied Duckworth Lewis System and compared our fathers’ 10th marks and gave him 1st rank!
Father- Ok Ok. 2nd rank is also very good! Keep it up!

Homonyms, anyone?

Posted on June 2, 2025 By Admin Comedy Majors No Comments on Homonyms, anyone?
English Jokes

Traffic cop pulls Mr. Flip.

Police: It says here on your license that you wear glasses.

Mr. Flip: I have contacts.

Police: I don’t care who you know.

The first 270 days…

Posted on May 1, 2025 By Admin Comedy Majors No Comments on The first 270 days…
English Jokes

A new CEO was hired to take over a struggling company. The CEO who was stepping down met with him privately and presented him with three numbered envelopes. “Open these if you run into serious trouble,” he said.

Well, three months later sales and profits were still way down and the new CEO was catching a lot of heat. He began to panic but then he remembered the envelopes. He went to his drawer and took out the first envelope. The message read, “Blame your predecessor.” The new CEO called a press conference and explained that the previous CEO had left him with a real mess and it was taking a bit longer to clean it up than expected, but everything was on the right track. Satisfied with his comments, the press – and Wall Street – responded positively.

Another quarter went by and the company continued to struggle. Having learned from his previous experience, the CEO quickly opened the second envelope. The message read, “Reorganize.” So he fired key people, consolidated divisions and cut costs everywhere he could. This he did and Wall Street, and the press, applauded his efforts.

Three months passed and the company was still short on sales and profits. The CEO would have to figure out how to get through another tough earnings call. The CEO went to his office, closed the door and opened the third envelope. The message said, “Prepare three envelopes.”

This did happen in our classes

Posted on April 14, 2025 By Admin Comedy Majors No Comments on This did happen in our classes
English Jokes

In our defence, Indian English is a recognised form of English. It has words like prepone and phrases like revert back.

When Sugar stands up for itself

Posted on April 14, 2025 By Admin Comedy Majors No Comments on When Sugar stands up for itself
English Jokes

We have to admit.. sugar has a point.

This is thinking ahead…

Posted on March 25, 2025 By Admin Comedy Majors No Comments on This is thinking ahead…
English Jokes

Savage Insults #2364

Posted on March 22, 2025 By Admin Comedy Majors No Comments on Savage Insults #2364
English Jokes

We deserve representation too

Posted on March 14, 2025 By Admin Comedy Majors No Comments on We deserve representation too
English Jokes

And next, it will be grey, for folks who mix blacks and whites…

The more things change….

Posted on March 13, 2025 By Admin Comedy Majors No Comments on The more things change….
English Jokes

This is the kind of seller we want .. not

Posted on March 12, 2025 By Admin Comedy Majors No Comments on This is the kind of seller we want .. not
English Jokes

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