Author: Admin Comedy Majors

No topical jokes BUT..

Posted on By Admin Comedy Majors No Comments on No topical jokes BUT..
Life Memes

This one is pure genius!

Why this is relevant:

We are currently in a state of war between the US and Israel on one side and Iran and its allies on the other.

The Straight of Hormuz is a key global sea route that has been blocked by Iran. This is hurting supply chains all over the world, including India.

After peace talks, Iran said it is not possible to declare the Strait of Hormuz safe because it has no record of where all the mines are, or how many there are!

Minesweeper is a computer based game where players have to guess where the mines are. If they accidentally step on even one mine, the game ends.

#ThatMomentWhenYouHaveToExplainAJokeBecauseBothTheWarAndtheGameMightBecomeHistory

That moment when you have to explain a joke because both the war and the game might become history.

Only Yes, Prime Minister can deliver it like this

Posted on By Admin Comedy Majors No Comments on Only Yes, Prime Minister can deliver it like this
English Jokes

Jim Hacker: Humphrey, we have to do something about Iran.

Sir Humphrey Appleby: Prime Minister, the government is already doing a great deal.

Jim Hacker: Such as?

Sir Humphrey Appleby: Monitoring developments, coordinating with allies, reviewing contingency plans and expressing concern.

Jim Hacker: That all sounds like nothing, Humphrey.

Sir Humphrey Appleby: On the contrary, Prime Minister. In diplomacy it is vital to appear active without becoming involved.

Jim Hacker: The Americans are bombing things, the Iranians are firing missiles, the Strait of Hormuz is practically closed and we’re… appearing active?

Sir Humphrey Appleby: Precisely.

Jim Hacker: Innocent people are dying, Humphrey!

Sir Humphrey Appleby: Yes, Prime Minister. That is why the Foreign Office is drafting a very strongly worded statement about it.

Jim Hacker: A statement won’t stop a war.

Sir Humphrey Appleby: No, Prime Minister, but it will ensure that we are on record as having been extremely concerned while it was happening.

Bernard Woolley: If I may, Prime Minister — the Cabinet Office has identified six possible courses of action.

Jim Hacker: Good! What are they?

Bernard Woolley: We can condemn the escalation, call for restraint, urge negotiations, support our allies, assist defensive operations or participate directly.

Jim Hacker: And what do they recommend?

Sir Humphrey Appleby: Supporting our allies.

Jim Hacker: That sounds suspiciously like participating.

Sir Humphrey Appleby: Oh no, Prime Minister. Participating means fighting. Supporting merely means allowing others to fight from places that technically belong to us.

Jim Hacker: Humphrey, if Iranian missiles hit one of our bases, we’ll be in the war anyway!

Sir Humphrey Appleby: Yes, Prime Minister, but we shall have entered it with the invaluable diplomatic advantage of being surprised.

Bernard Woolley: It’s generally considered the safest way to enter a war, Prime Minister.

Jim Hacker: How on earth can that be safe?

Sir Humphrey Appleby: Because if the war goes badly, we can say we never meant to join it. And if it goes well, we can say we were there all along.