Your happiness quotient – multiplied
A Punjabi opened a tea shop in China. He named it Punjab Tea Stall. The shop did not do well.
Then someone suggested that if you want to succeed in China you have to keep a Chinese name for your shop.
Now his shop is doing very well because he has changed the name of the shop to
CHA FOO FOO KARKE PEE
What do you call the ship of the desert?
The Tisandic
Who invented fractions?
Henry the 1/4th!
Student: How much is remaining, sir?
Teacher: it’s last 20, be quick.
Student: 20 what? Apples?
A Lawyer named Strange died and his wife asked the grave builder to inscribe on his grave,
“Here lies Strange, an honest man, and a lawyer.”
The grave builder insisted that such an inscription would be confusing, for the passersby would tend to think that three men were buried under the grave.
So, he suggested an alternative.
He would inscribe, “Here lies a man who was both honest and a lawyer.”
That way, whenever anyone walked by the grave and read it,
they would be certain to remark,
“That’s Strange!”
Which is true, but apparently, they expected these characters to form words.
Why was the ghost arrested?
He didn’t have a haunting license!
Told the doctor I was addicted to my laptop. He put me on a course of tablets.
One day, all the teaching colleagues of Dr. Flip got into a plane to fly to a conference.
The pilot came online and announced, “You will be delighted to know that all the work on building this plane has been done by your own students!”
Immediately, there was a mad scramble and all the teachers got off the plane before the air hostess could understand a thing.
Dr, Flip, however, remained calmly seated and in fact, opened the morning paper and started reading it.
“You must trust your students an awful lot, Prof!” The pilot could barely hide his admiration.
“Oh yes! Absolutely!” Flip replied, “If my students built it, this plane isn’t going anywhere.”
A woman went to the doctor complaining of pain all over her body.
“I hurt all over,” she said.
“What do you mean all over?” the doctor asked, “Can you be a little more specific?”
The woman proceeded to touch her right knee with her index finger and yelled, “Ow, that hurts.” Then her nose and yelled again, “Ouch! That also hurts.” Then she touched her left earlobe and yelled again, “Even that hurts doc.”
After examining her, the doctor came to a conclusion… the woman had a broken finger.
