Category: puns
puns
I have a dishonest joke about maths but I am 22 to tell it.
puns
If you are around when an Apple store is getting robbed, does that make you an iWitness?
English Jokes, puns
Good friends buy you lunch. Best friends eat your lunch.
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Your secrets are safe with me and all my friends.
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Why do trees have so many friends?
They branch out.
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Why don’t almonds have friends?
Because they’re nuts!
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“It is more fun to talk with someone who doesn’t use long, difficult words but rather short, easy words like ‘What about lunch?’”
- A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh
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“Love is blind; friendship tries not to notice.”
Michaela Edmond
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puns
What do you call the ship of the desert?
The Tisandic
- Original Pun by Ishaan Kaila
puns
Why was the ghost arrested?
He didn’t have a haunting license!
Told the doctor I was addicted to my laptop. He put me on a course of tablets.
English Jokes, puns
I thought about running for president
But I figured he should do his own exercise.
puns
There’s no pun like an IT pun. These are our favourites. Enjoy !
Why was the mobile phone wearing glasses? Because it lost its contacts.
Why did the developer become so poor? Because he used up all his cache.
What do you call an iPhone that sleeps too much? Dead Siri-ous.
What did the computer do during his break? He had a byte!
Why was the computer found cold and sneezing? Because someone left its Windows open!
Why did the computer arrive late at work? Because it had a hard drive.
puns
We bring you a Ponanza – a Pun Bonanza!
# I changed my iPod’s name to Titanic. It’s syncing now.
# England has no kidney bank, but it does have a Liverpool.
# A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.
# A bicycle can’t stand alone; it’s just two tired.
# – When she saw her first strands of grey hair she thought she’d dye.
# – I didn’t like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
# – Why is ‘dark’ spelt with a k and not c?
Because you can’t ‘c’ in the dark.
# – Why is it unwise to share your secrets with a clock?
Well, because time will tell.
# – Prison is just one word to you, but for some people, it’s a whole sentence.
# – I’m trying to organize a hide-n-seek tournament, but good players are really hard to find.
# – I’ve started telling everyone about the benefits of eating dried grapes. It’s all about raisin awareness!!!