HipDict is the crowdsourced dictionary that’s going strong with over 2 million followers. Here are a few examples of how HipDict tells it like it really is…
Home (n.) The place where you trust the toilet seat and the wi fi connects automatically.
English Teacher (n.) A person who puts more thought into a novel than the original author ever did.
Sibling (n.) You’d give them your kidney but you won’t let them borrow your charger.
Etc. (abb .) End of thinking capacity.
Oh, ok (phr.) I thought you understood me, but you don’t.
I’m fine (phr.) 1. Not dead. Still alive.
2. If you know what’s good for you, don’t be within a mile of me right now.
Friend (n.) Someone who listens to your bullshit, tells you it’s bullshit, and then listens to some more.
Everything happens for a reason (phr.) Sometimes the reason is you’re stupid and make bad decisions.
K. (adv.) Ok but with anger.
Psychopaths (n.) People who watch scary movies for fun and sleep fine afterwards.
Happiness (n.) Not having to set the alarm clock for the next day.
I’m going to sleep early tonight (phr.) The biggest lie you tell yourself.
Dad (n.) A person who has no clue what’s inside when you open a gift labelled “From Mom & Dad”.
A divine healer in a Kerala church called out, “Anyone with special needs who wants to be prayed for, come forward to the front”. Hearing that, Kunjappan got in line and when it was his turn, the Pastor asked, “What do you want me to pray for you?” Kunjappan replied, “Pastor, I need you to pray for help with my hearing.” The Pastor put one finger of one hand on Kunjappan’s ear, placed his other hand on top of Kunjappan’s head, and then prayed and prayed and the whole congregation joined in with much enthusiasm. After a few minutes, the Pastor removed his hands, stood back and asked: “Kunjappan, how is your hearing now?”
Kunjappan answered, “I don’t know. My hearing is actually next Thursday at the Ernakulam High Court!
Three middle-aged women are sitting on a park bench discussing their children.
“My son William studied Architecture at Cambridge. He’s 25 years old now and he makes £70, 000 a year at Bregmann and Hamann, ” the first woman says.
“My son Charlie read law at Oxford. He’ll be turning 23 in October and he makes £100, 000 a year at Shoe Lane Chambers, ” says the second woman.
“My son Max didn’t go to university. He left school at the age of 16, as a matter of fact. He’s 30 now, but he makes half a million a year working as a sports mechanic in London, ” the third woman says.
“I’ve heard of car mechanics, plane mechanics, and typewriter mechanics, but not a sport mechanic. What’s that? ” the first woman asks.
“Well, you know, he fixes rugby matches, football matches, tennis matches…. “
